Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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jews

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

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What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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yesterday, a girl asked me why a guy is Bro if he bangs alot of chicks, and chicks are hoes if they do alot of guys. i said to her “well, if one key can open a lot of locks, then it is the master key. if a lock can be opened by alot of keys, then it’s a shittyass lock, isn’t it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday, Popeyes has a special sale buy one get one free fried chicken. The chicken was like "Oh hell no, today's Tuesday? I'm funna get my feathery-asss out of here.." However, chickens do not know what day it is, nor do they care about being captured by humans. I also made up the part when the chicken began talking.

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

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Don't believe in Atheists.

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what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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Yo Mama just died.

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Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

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A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

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What do you call 1 black guy and 9 other white guys? Patrick Mills

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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