Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

what worse than bitting into an apple and finding a worm bitting into a worm and finding an apple

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

Why did John get hard? He froze to death

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

Why didn't the boy have any pockets on? He didn't have any pants on

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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