Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

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How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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woman's rights

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are about to be executed by a firing squad. Before they shoot the brunette, they ask if she was any last words. “Look, a tornado!” Then they shoot her.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

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Axel? Its Eliza, is that you? You alive again? I don't want to be no successor of anything, but thanks I guess. Neo-Nero has not shown up since you returned, I think he isn't very proud of himself and wont be a problem here on forward. He did push me aside, but now that you are alive, I wont even consider the thought of you "dying again" and unless you are dying or seriously ill, I don't want to hear anything about it. Seriously, how bad are you doing? Physically I mean? I am relieved, I mean we all thought you where dead.

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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9/11 my birthday

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What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

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Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number

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NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

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What is worse than being lost in the supermarket? Being lost in space.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

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But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

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What do you call a dead blond in a coset? Last years hide and seek winner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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