Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

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What did 4 Year Old Jonny get for his birthday? Death.

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Q:What does a wheel a triangle and a circle all have in common A:There all round, I lied about the triangle.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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Canadians

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men's rights activists

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He than orders some drinks.

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p

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: 1 out of every 44 presidents can dunk, who is it? A: How the hell am i suppost to know

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

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why did the cow say baaaaa ? it was a stupid cow

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How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

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Q:What's funny about a Jew marrying a Nazi? A:The situation

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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What's the difference between a duck? Both legs are of equal length, especially the right.

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the farmer that was trying to kill it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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