Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you know what time it is? Because I don't wanna be late for class and if you told the time, it will surely help me because I'll be able to arrive early at my class not to mention it would greatly improve my punctuality efforts to help me pass the class this semester. Geez, I remember back in middle school there was a guy name Billy Jones and he used to always be late for class. His name was Billy but we called him Bill. Bill was his nickname but his real name was Billy. Anyways, he was always late for class because he would always make the best barbecue ribs in town.... (45 minutes later...) ....and I told Bill, "Man, if you were to just ask what time it was it would greatly help you in arriving to class early." And he was was like "I know but..."And then I cut him off and I said "But nothing. I don't care what kind of barbecue ribs you make, you just can't do that." So there I was, me and him, sitting down and .... (3 hours later...) ...it was awesome. Boy, I remember back in the early 90's when I was at elementary school, it was a stormy weather and we had to go to class. That's when I met Clarissa. She was a really nice girl and I remember there was a time when... (to be continued....)

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

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One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

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Your momma is so stupid Her iq must be below 50

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A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

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How many armless people does it take to change a lightbulb? I dunno, that's why I asked you... Hello?

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Yo mama's so fat she has diabetes.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

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So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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A black man and a white man get married... Trick question, since gay marriage is illegal in the United States, the men did not get married, and they later both died alone.

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Why do blind people laugh at this joke? Because they can't read it and everyone else is laughing.

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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A black man walks into a... nevermind, this joke is dumb.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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You're tall.

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What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

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Why was the chinese man kicked out of the bar? Because he was under aged

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

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Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

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what kind of dog can tiptoe

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What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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