What did the hose say to the sprinkler? I'm gonna squirt you.

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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What do you call white people on a bench? NBA What do you call black people on a bench? RTA

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Your so stupid that when during your baseball game your third base coach told you to run home, you did. The next day, you failed your test.

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HELLO EVERYONE

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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what did spiderman say before he saved mary jane? ill save you mary jane.

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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What's small, furry and looks like a mouse? Most probably a mouse but given the large number of mammals with similar appearances to a mouse it could easily be a shrew, vole or even a rat if you don't know your rodents very well.

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops