Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

A young boy walked into a hardware store and asked for a long weight. Luckily, the shop owner was kindly and brought the child up to speed on the process of hazing.

What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

So A duck wants to be a musician. Day1: He cuts of his beak attempting to sing. Day2: Dead

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

why did the other chicken cross the road peer pressure

curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

So a man walks into a bar with a monkey. I forgot the rest of this joke, but your mom is a whore.

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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