A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's a foot long and slippery, a slipper

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I know what you do with your right hand. You part-take in everyday activities such as eating, typing, grooming and maneuvering.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Simon says.. Nothing because he's deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +4

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops