What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Yo momma so pretty,she gets a lot of compliments.

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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what did nena say in the library while her and her friends were on anti-jokes? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

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Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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whats the differnce between madalin macan and batman?...batman returns

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What is the difference between my right hand and my left hand? I used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Want to hear the World's shortest joke? Peace. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops