Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

Why Was the straight man in love ? because he was an intelligent human being who had the formula of understanding woman .

Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was convicted of murder and rape

-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

Knock Knock Whos there? Knock knock? Whos there? Knock knock. WHOS IS THERE?!?!? Knock Knock is, my name is Knock Knock.

Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

Gay rights.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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