The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.

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Q: What do you call a colour blind person that smells like green paint? A: A painter

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Chuck Norris was so famous we was casted for the show Walker, Texas Ranger

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Why did the little girl fall of the cliff? Someone pushed her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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"I'm terrible at writing jokes." -80% of the people on here.

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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