What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

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Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

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We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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how does a chinese chick check if she's pregnant? swallows a rubix cube and if it comes out solved shes pregnant

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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How many blonds does it take to screw in a light bulb? ... It shouldn't take anymore than one person to do this job, regardless of there hair color.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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The last joke I tried to submit used "trolololol" as the enter code thing and I spelled it without the extra "lol" The lolz have got me again *this time it asked me for "basket case"

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A pretty funny pick-up line that probably doesn't work: "Hey, do you work at Little Caesar's? Because you're hot and I'm ready.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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-How do fit an elefant in a refrigerator? Open the door and shove it in -How do u fit a giraffe in a refrigerator? Take the elephant out and put the giraffe in -If the king of the jungle has a meating which animal doesn't come? The giraffe because hes in the refrigerator -How do u cross a lake where aligators and snakes live? U swimm because they're at the meeting

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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