Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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Where did the cow go? To the slaughter house!!!

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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whats the difference between a black man and a cat? you dont run from a cat

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas were meant to be put in an oven.

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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A dog was barking at a tree

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops