Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

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What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

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why did sally fall off a swing she had no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Why are black people good at basketball? Because they practice.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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A black man and a Mexican man are in the back of a car. Who's driving? Not enough information to answer this question.

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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Blonde Girl: Why is this green-painted man throwing forks at me?! Green-Painted Man: It is confusing you, no?

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12345678910111213141516171819whatcomesnext

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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A heavily drunk man walks into a bar and proceeds to die of alcohol poisoning.

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Dylan: "I dont understand anti-jokes"

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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