Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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Why did I laugh at a joke? Cuz it was funny

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What did the chicken say when it layed the square egg? Ouch.

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

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Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

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Did you hear about the blonde that crashed her car? No. Is she okay?

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Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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What did the players of the all black NBA team say to the white rookie? "Congratulations for making it to the NBA! Your hard work and dedication has certainly paid off."

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Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What's worse than cutting yourself? Deadly tornadeos.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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