A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

You Scream, I Scream, The cops come, It's awkward

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, If you do find one, what`s your plan?

What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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