Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

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Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

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What junk did she have in her trunk? Mcdonalds because shes fat as hell.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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What happens when you give a math problem to a blonde? She works through it to arrive at the answer.

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

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What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

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There is no I in team... But there is a u in suck. There is no I in team, but there is in awesome

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Yo mama so fat you have to grease the door frame and hold a twinkie on the other side just to get her through.

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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Why was the old man lying on the floor? He had a heart attack and died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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