What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

Why did little polly fall off her her roof? Because she saw a ice-cream van

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

Rawan what are you looking at, stop reading this

Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

XD Thats what I was expecting from you, you do not go down without a bit of struggle and a tussle huh?

What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...