a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana? Knock knock Who's there? Banana Knock knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you glad you don't have cancer?

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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what do you call a baby with a stamp on his nose.? Kentucky won the national championship this year

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Why did the white girl become a lesbian? Because she was raped and had no more trust in the male gender.

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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A rapist walks into a bar He orders a drink He wakes up the next morning naked on a hot chick He leaves not realizing that he is nude and is promptly escorted by the police to jail

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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