What's white, wet, and loved by women? A polar bear cub.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

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What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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So a bar walks into a man...

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what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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Lets just say, that I can tell anyone that my brother is one of the top leaders for Interpol (here in the nation we reside in) and that while I do not have the required education to work for interpol, I have connections with them, which allows me to work, well... Yeah, Central.

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man in a gorilla suit with a banana.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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A priest and a rabbi walks into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says "is this some kind of joke?".

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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dylan wishes life was like cod. that way he would actually be able to do something cool

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What's the difference between a piece of chicken and a black guy? One is delicious and the other isn't good for your health.

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A:Wanna hear a joke? B: Sure A: A joke

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom? Magic.

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops