A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

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wanna hear a joke? me niether.

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I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

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A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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What do you do when your wife is about have a baby? Throw her off the balcony go into parking lot and reach into her mouth if you feel a leg stab her in the belly button untill her intestines are coming out and burn the body singing Elmo's world

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What do you call a leper in a spa bath? Say excuse me Sir (or Madam), I notice you have leprosy, did you know that it is treatable? MDT for multibacillary leprosy consists of rifampicin, dapsone, and clofazimine taken over 12 months. Dosages adjusted appropriately for children and adults are available in all primary health centres in the form of blister packages.[17] Single dose MDT for single lesion leprosy consists of rifampicin, ofloxacin, and minocycline. The move toward single-dose treatment strategies has reduced the prevalence of disease in some regions, since prevalence is dependent on duration of treatment. World Leprosy Day was created to draw awareness to leprosy and its sufferers

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i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Heroshima

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A watch and a pair of socks.

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Why was the little girl crying? Because she was hanging upside down from an oak tree.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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