Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

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Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

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What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

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What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Lindsay Lohan

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops