You got yourself a mole, I suggest you restrict all access to any and everyone that could possibly go under aliases such as: The Wiz. Azure. Dungeon Lord. Dice. Wizard, and anything similar, he is most likely a computer geek which does not necessarily look like one.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Forget about them, do not compare yourself to those beneath you, you always wanted to help as many as possible, in a world where everyone fights for themselves only.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown how angry are you?

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's white and sticky.... Jizz

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A black man, a mexican man, and a caucasian man, walk into a bar with handguns. The three break out into a gun fight and everyone is killed in the cross-fire

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why was the boy sick? Because he accidently ate his own feces.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

mangos mandarins mushrooms mustache :{

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How can you tell if there is an idiot at a dogfight? When someone pits a Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a moron at a dogfight? When someone BETS on the Chihuahua. How can you tell if there is a cheater at a dogfight? When the victory goes to the Chihuahua.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

yo momma so old that when she whent to school there was no history class

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Do you want to hear a joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops