What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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