A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

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What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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69.

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A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

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What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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what's worse than 24? 6 million.

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Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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My friend was waving a stick around and yelling out spells, so walked up to him and asked "You want to be Harry Potter, don't you?" He replied excitedly "Yeah!!" So i killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese man get on a cruise ship? He didn't have a ticket.

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Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

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roses are red violets are blue i'm a schizophrenic and so am i

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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