A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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Robin, get in the car!

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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A class of kids were bouncing basketballs in class and a woman teacher comes in and says,"No balls in the classroom please." All the boys leave the class.

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

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A boy spelled the word "banana" wrong on a spelling test... Points were deducted.

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What was a hard time for people? the great depression

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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Why did the Italian family have spaghetti for dinner? Thats the only thing they had in the house

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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Could not care less if he is jealous, too busy living it up, anyways thanks for notifying me, and guys, I know I could call up the office and tell you all that you wont get paid if you remain reading my comments, I might not be leading by example today, but I suggest you get back to work, as for the case whose name we do not reveal here, my part is done, yes I know, you can find it under cabinet C in my office, the thick file with the color pictures (the only one with color pictures) And that is why I am taking a break, now please get back to work, as I said I could just call down at every damn office room, but that would be unfair for those that are not on horsecrap network. Thanks people, keep the flag flying. Nero your overlord Fuck formalities, im not at work today.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

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Why don't you hit a black guy riding a bike? Because that is dangerous and he could get hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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