In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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What do you call a kid that hasnt passes 7th grade? A 6th grader

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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What did the homeless man buy with a dollar? Nothing. He didn't have a dollar.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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hi

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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Why did the boy lose his change? He had no Pants Why did the boy have no pants? The Holocaust

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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