Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a guy walks in to a bar in iraq. 10 people died because of it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a deceased human infant and the other is a delicious citrus fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Squirrel swim across the river upside down? To keep its nuts dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

when chuck norris does a pushup, he is tearing the muscles in his biceps, deltoids, core, and triceps in order to make them stronger.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the teacher ask her student about the test? Because she was in the hospital the day of the test because her husband was hit by a rail road spike and died but she was so devoted to her job she wanted to know.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

0000000010000000000000001000000000000000000000011111111000000000111111000000000000000000011111000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000100000000000000000000000000000000000000001000000000000000000000000000000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000000000111100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001111111111111111100000000000000000000000001000000000000001000000000000000000000000001000000000000100000000000000000000000000001111111111111000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 SMILE

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops