*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Which is heavier, a tonne of feathers or a tonne of lead? It doesn't matter when your loved ones are being torn apart by bears.

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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What's a Mexican's favorite sport? It depends on the person. To generalize and select one sport to represent the entire race would be stereotyping.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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Your mommas so fat she jumped into the ocean and immediately had to start swimming.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

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Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

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Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

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If I became the president of the U.S.A I would change our national animal from eagle to smeagle. Like this if you agree. By Adam Chebali

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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how much c o c k could a n i g g e r lick if a f a g g o t licked a d i c k

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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