Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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Steve is getting paid $29.50 to bounce a ball Steve is getting fired monday

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

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What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poetry Show me your titties

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What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

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Whats worse than biting an apple with a worm in it? Getting stabed until you died and being fed to your own children....... twice

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Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

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Fat? Jesse Z

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

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Santa Claus and eight reindeers walk into a bar. “Hey, fatty,” the barman shouts. “Where’s Rudolph?” “He’s dead,” Santa replied. “I’m sorry to hear that,” the barman said, looking embarrassed. “Let me get you a drink.”

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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