What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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outside your comfort zone

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Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

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Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

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How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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Why doesn't God like pizza? Because he doesn't exist.

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

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What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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What's the difference between dead babies and punching bag? No one makes jokes about punching bags.

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Yo mama so fat she runs the risk of stroke, heart disease, or diabetes

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Why celebrate your birthday, its just getting closer and closer the death.

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How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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