Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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What starts with P and ends in ORN Popcorn!

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

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dyslexic's Untie

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

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Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

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A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

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Knock knock Who's there? No one ever mentioned someone named "there" it's me, Jim

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No antijoke here.

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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What's the difference between a duck?

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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