Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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What do Muslims have for breakfast? Corn Flakes.

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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school homewrok

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What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

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a man was walking out side to get the news paper what happened next he picked up the newspaper

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what do you call a black man flying an airplane a pilot, you racist

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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