Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

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What do you call a pig standing on its back legs? Yo mama

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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A man walked into a bar. He said "ow".

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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What if Chuck Norris got shot by a bullet? The most interesting man in the world would save him.

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Q: What did the guy say to his girlfriend? A: "I like turtles!" Then he smacks her ass.

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If Pythagoras was racist, he would have made hypotenuses.

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What do you call an aircraft piloted by a Muslim extremist? The aircraft's brand name followed by its model number, in all likelihood.

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A Muslim, a Jew, a Christian, and an Atheist are eating at the same table. They are friends, and they do this from time to time.

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How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

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You mamma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her!

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A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

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Why did lady gaga set her alarm? So she could get up in the morning.

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What happened when the terrorist with a bomb went into a school. He blew up and everyone died.

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This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

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One kid clicks his pen. The kid sitting next to home clicks his pen. They next 3 kids click their pens. The teacher walks by and says "monkey see monkey do." And the kid that first clicked his pen responded and says "monkey pees all over you."

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra but like he actually did not a bar a womens breats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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