Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall again? Because somebody put her back on. Why wasn't she able to hug her dad? Because she has no dad.

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

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Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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What's Black, white, green, and red? To bloody zebras fighting over a pickle

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Why are all the other numbers scared of 7? Beacuse 7 stabbed his mother with a steak knife.

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

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What do Grant and Lee have in common? They're both black males

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Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

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What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office, naked but wrapped in Saran Wrap. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "I can clearly see your nuts."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops