What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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What do you call a black guy that steals a car? A father desperate to save his dying son who doesn't have a car to drive to a hospital

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Why was the woman out of the kitchen? She was at her mother's funeral.

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How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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Womens rights

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

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Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

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what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

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What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

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Where do penguins keep their money? No where. Penguins don't have a money economy

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Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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Anti - Jokes. com

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

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I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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