Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

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Why did the city disappear? Someone nuked it

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What's worse than strapping 10 dead baibes to a tree? Strapping a dead baby to 10 trees.

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

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Q: What do you call a Jew in space? A: An astronaut you racist bastard!

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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If a Cheetah and Usain bolt raced in the Olympics who would win? Obviously Usain hes black and cheetahs can't perform in the olympics

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What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

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Whats fluffy, multicolored, and dances like a disco santaclaus? i don't know.

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops