"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

how did the snake fly? it couldnt snakescant fly

Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

What makes us laugh? Definitely not this joke!

How do you know if you have athlete's foot? You ask your doctor, and he will tell you.

If there's something strange in your neighborhood. Who ya gonna call? The Police.

What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

Q: Why do only 10% of women go to heaven? Your question is fundamentally wrong. Religion is a collective hallucination.

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being disturbed by two black guys raping a young girl with leukemia

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

What happens to a banana after it gets sunburnt? It peels.

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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