Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

Why did the man cross the street? Because he had to go work.

Justin Bieber

What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

What did the gay black man say after JFK was shot? Wow thats really sad but I have such an appetite right now so i should probably go to eat.

Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

Whats better than 32 dead babies stapled to 1 tree? - 1 dead baby stapled to 32 trees

Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's blue and can't read? The Pacific Ocean

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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