Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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In Soviet Russia, people commonly suffered under the might of the communist juggernaut. It was unpleasant.

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Whats 9 inches long, pink, and makes women scream? A miscarriage OuO

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

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What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

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Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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There was a a round house with no corners.How many corners were there? 100 ,I never said that that it had to be that house.

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How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? This year I'm going to win the golden brief case!

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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Knock Knock F*ck of I'm watching p0rn

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

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2 men were friends 1 went to hell The other went to heaven

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How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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