What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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An Australian man walking in Manhattan is approached by another man who pulls out a switchblade and says, "give me your wallet or I'll stab you with this knife!" The Australian man hands over his wallet. A nearby police officer witnesses this the last moment of the mugging, arrests the criminal and returns the Australian's belongings.

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

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Your mom is so fat that her every day life if a struggle and she has to get gastric bypass surgery or else she is going to die

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Things i love to hate: Conspiracy theorists Religious fundamentalists Hypocritical people Sally (she has no arms) People selling pyramid schemes Liars, con-artists, thieves. Rapists, child molesters, serial killers Terrorists, politicians, and keyboard warriors That is all.

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

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I went to church.. i didn't get raped. I went to school... I didn't get raped. I went into a back alley... I didn't get raped. I went home... I didn't get raped. Today was better than yesterday...

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

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What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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Why is the world going to end on 9 December 2014? I don't know why, but IT IS

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lets work together to make all racists jokes in negitives

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One, two, three, four and five

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

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Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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