My dad weights 350 lbs. He decided to switch to diet soda.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Reed read? A. Read?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did I the granda fall out of her wheel chair?. She fell down the steps

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Yo momma's so fat she went to Antartica and all the penguins were like, "Woah. You're fat."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops