"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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what in the world is smarter than the world's smartest man? Nothing he is the smartest man.

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why do people take pictures in the bathroom? because they just got done taking a crap and they wanna see if they lost weight.

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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A duck walks into a bar. A horse walks into a bar. A cow walks into a bar. A bear walks into a bar. The owner tells them to get out, but they can't understand humans. So they just stayed there.

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

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Whats the worst thing your parents could ever do to a teenager? Take there phone.

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Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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Black people deserve to be slaves for their entire lives. WHITE POWER.

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

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Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

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what would u di if u were having anal sex with a black guy and his dick was soooo bi that ir rippped ur asshole? staple it back together

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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are u black unlucky

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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