What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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The truth is he loves her!!

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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there was a lesbian, a bi-sexual and a homosexual at a wine bar having a drink.......They had a great night

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Your mother is so fat, that she was instructed by her doctor to go on a low carbohydrate, high protein diet to reduce the risk of heart disease later in life.

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What do you get when you combine a cat and a dog? A Cog

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Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops