What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Why didn't Joey play with the other kids on the playground? Answer: He was dead

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Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Jesus Christ

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What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

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Why did the boy show off his ps4? Because his mom was rapped and murdered And his dad molested him when he was younger

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

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Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

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What do Ethiopians do on Fridays? Starve.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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