A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

You wake, and up for a second you are dazed. Then you open your eyes slowly because you are afraid of what is to come. You then remember oh right I had a sleepover at john smith's house.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

First the lord created light by shouti... ...Then the lord travelled back in time in order to create voice before that. The lord then said "I almost logic and everything failed at the very beginning. he corrected himself and saw it was good,

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A man is traveling to the nearest grocery store. He stops at an intersection and notices a another car beside him. It was a black corvet. So he blew it up and the men inside of it as well. He then proceeded to call the cops as to try to cover the explosion up as if it was not his fault. Unfortunately, the police had video evidence of the incident through video surveillance and the man was arrested for life. He never got a second chance in life and eventually died a slow, painful death in the hands of cancer at the age of 91.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is brown and sticky? Maple Syrup.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A lysdexic man trys to rite a joek... the people who tried reading it got confused and offered help in rewriting it.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Bill: Wanna know the difference between knowledge and wisdom? Joe: Sure Bill: Knowledge is knowing that an apple is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put it in a fruit salad.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

youre in a room with justin bieber and a gun with 5 bullets..........

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did your mom die? Cuz i killed her

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops