What did the waitress do when the man asked for pizza? She ran away

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

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Why did the retarted kids head get stuck in the window? It was a very small window

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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Heyy everyone text this number 320-510-3277 Kay ask him why he poops the bed at age 17 .. His name is mike geier.. Haha

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Why didn't Santa deliver presents until the night after Christmas? You should go ask someone who knows.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Immigration. You're headed back to mexico.

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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An Asian, a redneck, an Irish, and an Iranian walk into a bar. All but the Iranian were asked to go back to the parking lot and park their car to take up only one space.

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Peas

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What happened to the gay guy? He died of aids...

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

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What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

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roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve You, but don't start anything."

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops