Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

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Stripper went to strip club to ask for work. - It was closed

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A man in a state penitentiary drops his soap. He then picks it up and continues his shower.

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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What's the difference between a bowling ball and guacamole? The guacamole is delicious with chips, and the bowling ball is just a bowling ball.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

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What did the orphan get for Christmas? Nothing, the orphanage did not have sufficient funds to give everyone a present because they did not want to how favoritism because the orphans are already sad enough and te orphanage does not want the orphans killing them selves

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances, one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends PS: the one above was wrong sorry :(

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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Ed has spent all his days on the farm. It was the farm of his father and grandfather before him; long have they prospered from the fruits of this land. He has a wife and 3 beautiful children, all of whom live happily on the farm. Ed still manages to keep an active social life, and has lots of interesting friends. His best friend is Moe. As a young man, Ed had spent a few years living in the city for his studies. Moe lives in the city, and he knows Ed from College. One day, Moe came out to the farm to have lunch with his old friend. After lunch, he and Ed took a walk around the farm. They passed by the horses, the chickens, the pigs and finally they came to the cows. Ed looked at Moe, and he saw that he was focused intently on a single cow. "What's the matter, Moe?" he asked. "That," Moe said, "is one skinny cow."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops