How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

whats green and red green and red green and red? a frog in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Disreguard Females Aquire Currency

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +14

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the chicken cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

thumb_up thumb_down +12

roses are black violets are black i am blind

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops