"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Getting raped..

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

Why was the black man out of a job? because he was recently laid off and had not found any job offerings that he would be interested in

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q:What do you call a mexican witha clean record? A: Impossible

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

Why did the boy fail math? He got bad grades.

someone called someone else a frog

Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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