what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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i like turtles

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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Knock knock Who's there? Barack obama

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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What do Barbra Streisand and Danny Glover have in common? Nothing.

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What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

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why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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Knock Knock Whos there 9/11 nine eleven who? You said you would never forget...

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What's the difference between a bowl of chili and a urologist? One's hot n' spicy and the other analyzes urine. -Emo Phillips

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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