whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

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Q: How did the black guy die? A: After a long battle with a terrible case of pneumonia he struggled to breath and died a slow and peaceful death... R.I.P. Dad

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cool

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Do you play piano? No

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

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Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops