roses are red violets are blue, were stuck to gather like superglue in tell you get the flu, then I'm not touching you :)

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

What do elephants and grapes have in common? They are both purple arpart from the elephant, which is grey. I lied about it being purple

What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

How was a blonde woman able to get into Harvard? She was smart and had a very good SAT score.

Dear 6, Please stop hitting on me, I heard you've done some pretty dirty stuff with 9. Sincerely, 7

What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

what is worse than finding finding an apple in your worm? Finding your peanut shells in your peanut.

Everyone is different, but there are two of me, therefore I am unique. I have 72 different personalities, which all think, act and behave the same, all have my same name, but its still different to have such a thing eh? No I am not asking, I just added that weird little lightbulb symbol after "eh". People buy my book, its full of this nonsense... Its named "Are you left winged, or wrong winged" The book that has nothing to do with politics, and everything to do with politicians non existent sexlife! (seriously I had a book signing today... It was weird, people like stood in line twenty Signatures... AND PEOPLE ARE ALL GOING "HEY ARE YOU THAT GUY FROM HORSEHEAD?" Nero -WHO THE FUCK! IS THAT GUY ON HORSEHEAD?

Person 1: I got a really good knock, knock joke. Person 2: Okay. Person 1: You start. Person 2: Knock, knock. Person 1: Who's there? Person 2: ...

Friend: Dude are you going to see the hunger games? Me: But i alreay seen it Friend: Dafuq? its not even out yet. Me: African children invented the hunger games. Friend: -.-

What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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