what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

How did the guy who's been in his mothers basement for 20 years lose his virginity? He didn't, that's where his mother hid his body.

Why did the White man scream when he saw a Black man? Because he was scared.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

Yo momma is so ugly that she uses it as motivation to work hard and thus for achieve more than a lot of whores do

A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

Q. What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? A. A bench is an inanimate object used for sitting on while a Mexican is a human being.

Your mama's so stupid that i wouldn't be surprised if you were to tell me that she didn't graduate high school.

What did the black man do for his science project Which is better homemade or colonel sanders?

What did one ginger say to the other We have red hair

All these jokes are very entertaining, but if you look closely, Lebron clearly travels. Wheres the call ref what the hell.

your friend: i did ur mom you: jokes on u my moms gross friend:.....

What's worse then the holocaust? Stepping on a lego.

Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

whats worse than failing your maths test?

Why couldn't the Asian man speak in chinese? He never learned chinese

What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

Whats more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork.

A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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