Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why does Larry the Cable Guy get his own T.V. show??? Why can't I have one of my own??? .......ah...forgot....I'm a minority...

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did 9/11 poop on a condominium? fuk

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Proof that the Chicken came first than the Egg is all in the good book. It's called, The Dictionary!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

charlie sheen becomes sober.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

thumb_up thumb_down -20

This is a shovels and rakes conversation. No hoes allowed.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS JOKE??? A: Another joke you didn't think was funny... REFRIGERATOR!! O.k. Now it's funny!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

who do you call those who give this joke a thumbs down? people

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the man say to the orphan? No one loves you, you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

LISTEN UP PEEPS, I'M GOING TO SHOW YOU MY PASSWORD.. just as shown on screen THIS IS IT: ******* YEP just as shown on screen

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops