Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

when life gives you lemons throw them away.. they are probably bad

Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

A: Ask me if I'm a tree. B: Are you a tree? A: psh, no! *gives offended look and walks away*

What Did batman say to robin before they got in the car..... Get in the car

i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

Roses are red Violets go poo My name is Dave How bout u

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

Hey Skrillex! Can you do me a favor and hold this bass for me? Sure thing, no problem. 3 seconds later... Oops! My bad! I just dropped it.

A man walks into a bar. His crippling alcoholism is tearing his family apart.

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

No thank you, I don't like violence

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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